Sunday, March 16, 2014

The Affordable Olympics

You can afford to go to the Olympics.  Wait, let me re-phrase that-if you're smart and patient, you can afford to go to the Olympics.  Here's how we did it, with tips from both me and Jessica!


Lara says:

Tickets can vary in cost from really reasonable to "Holy crap, WHAT DOES THAT TICKET COST?"  Tickets for the shining star events go for over $500 a pop (gymnastics and the 100m/200m races at the Summer Olympics, figure skating at the Winter Games).  So, if you're really set on seeing gymnastics, you might want to make that your only ticket!  Here's what we paid in Sochi:
Luge-$41
Ski Jumping-$62
Women's Downhill-$126
Women's Hockey-$41 (We didn't use this ticket as we bought USA v. Russia men's hockey tickets that was the same day and time, but were able to unload these)
Short Track Speed Skating-$65
Ladies Super G-$103
Men's Super Combined-$65
Biathlon-$65
Curling-$43
Snowboarding Halfpipe-$108
Men's Hockey (USA vs Russia)-$166
Nordic Combined-$62
Snowboard Cross-$145

We were in Sochi for 8 days of competition, and we can tell you-this is a LOT of tickets.  In fact, about 1 event per day is a pretty good clip, and if you do buy more than one event on a day, get events that are in the same location, like both in the mountains or in Olympic Park.  The transport between might not get you where you need to be on time, and you don't want to miss a minute!

Lodging
In London, hotel rooms and flat rentals were plentiful and reasonable because of the size of the market.  Sochi was much smaller and more difficult to find a place-and as many of you saw, even those that got hotels didn't necessarily get FINISHED hotels.  We paid the following:

London-Approximately $114/person per night
Sochi-$111/person per night (breakfast included)

We were on a cruise ship that appeared to have been renovated around 1988, while our flat in London was amazing, with a rooftop patio and a 5 minute walk to the tube.  London was definitely the better value, even if we did find a place for a little less in Sochi.
Some of our friends that are Olympic pros have been successful at using award points to absorb a large chunk or the entirety of their hotel bill.  If you've got points, start hoarding them now and finding ways to earn more to absorb that cost.  We used Coach House Rentals in London (which we highly recommend-only a 20% bump for the Olympic rate), and then found a cruise ship to book via a friend's suggestion along with keeping up with Sochi discussion threads on Trip Advisor.  Definitely check Trip Advisor-there were locals helping out many Americans with their questions on bookings and places to stay in Sochi.

Airfare
You would think this is the biggest expense, and it could be.  Average airfare from Chicago O'Hare to Rio is about $1400.  Average airfare from Chicago O'Hare to Seoul is about $1100.

Lara's Flight
It would appear to take about 60,000 awards miles to get to Rio, and about 70,000 to get to Seoul.  I used 60,000 award miles to get from Chicago to Moscow, then had to switch airlines to Siberian Airlines (S7) for the Moscow-Sochi leg, which ran me about $350.  If you open a United/American/Delta credit card, you generally get about 25,000 free miles for the signup, and there are times when you can purchase triple miles for the cost of one.  You also earn a mile for every dollar you spend.  So if you start earning now, you can have a free flight to the Olympics just waiting for you.

Erin & Mike's Flight
Erin and Mike got a SICK deal on airfare-$600 from Dulles to Sochi, with 1 stop in Istanbul on Turkish Air.  They took advantage of a great online sale, and made the drive from Cleveland to DC, where they have friends and family that helped put them up both coming and going from Russia.  So, keep an eye on airfare on direct sites, on Expedia, or any other travel website you prefer-who knows what kind of amazing deal you can find!

Spending Money
If you think about the Olympics in terms of a standard vacation, the tickets to events are your "activities" for the day-what you'd be spending on museum admission or snorkeling, so a lot of your expense is up front and in your tickets.  Food and drink, although not always the tastiest, are actually pretty reasonable.  More reasonable than Lollapalooza, that's for sure!  Beer in London venues was about $5 each, and beer in Sochi was also about $5, and they were tall boys.  Food at the events ranged from $5-$9 per meal period.  We definitely took advantage of the hookups that were offered to us-free breakfast on our cruise ship in Sochi, free snacks, beer, wine, and water along with sushi from Morimoto at the Chase VIP Lounge in London, and free food, beer, and wine at the P&G house in Sochi's Olympic Park.  Souvenirs with official Olympic logos can be overpriced, but there is also a large range of products that vary enough in price to find something that fits your budget.

We'd love to answer any question you might have on how to plan your budget!  See you in Pyeongchang!


Jessica says:

We've had a lot of people telling us that they want to go to the Olympic Games because of how much fun we've had. But the numbers that the media are putting out there sound so astronomical, you'd think it was impossible. It isn't, but we have some suggestions to help keep your trip low-cost so that you can spend more money on FUN when you get there!

Get a United VISA card. Stop squealing, American Airlines people. There's a reason. United is the official airline of the USA Olympic team, so you're nearly guaranteed that there will be an airlink for you when you get ready to book your ticket. If you book the ticket a year out, when they first become available, you will have the best opportunity to get a low mileage ticket. Also, watch our blog. We'll be looking for the cheapest way for everyone to get there as well.

Buy as many tickets as possible at the ticket drop that is one year before the Games. In advance of the drop, you will know dates of events. We chose to always buy C level, or general admission, when it was available, because it's the cheapest. Sometimes venues will also have empty seats, so you can move closer or into open areas. Popular events will always cost more, so keep that in mind.

Start researching housing one year in advance. Cosport offers packages, but we found that their prices were nearly double what we paid in Sochi for accommodations we found on our own. Watch Trip Advisor threads about Olympic housing as well--that's where we found our reasonably priced, conveniently located cruise ship that was parked near Olympic Park.

Sunday, February 23, 2014

до свидания СОЧИ! Translation: Goodbye Sochi!

The torch just went out in the Olympic Park in Sochi, and I'm really, really sad. Mostly because I know I won't have as much fun as we had for another 4 years, but I'm also sad that something we've been planning ever since we left London in August 2012 is over! We'll be even MORE prepared in Korea!

I'm planning to post a video with all of our photos soon, so watch out for that! 

In the meantime, I'd like to hand out some awards and recognize some great quotes: 

Favorite Event: Snowboard Cross. It was so exciting when they would all pop up over the last hill, and all the crashes and races made it fabulous. I'm definitely getting tickets to as many "races" as possible at our next games.

Favorite app: Sorry Sochi 2014, you're close second, but the translator app all the Russkies were using to communicate with us wins. Questions about "molesting" us and other hilarity I SHOULD have photographed made for much better laughs.


Favorite Foreign Fans:  The Russians. They cheer in a lower voice. They want to be best friends with USA! They were the ONLY country to party with us when biathlon got cancelled! (Vincent, too, but it's possible we held him hostage). The Aussies take a close second for me. Every person we met was friendly, chatty, and they cheered for us sometimes (Canada, take note! You can redeem yourself in Korea!)


Favorite Christenson Sister:  Lara. She tried to stay with me when they were taking me away in an ambulance. I gave her noravirus and she forgave me. She woke up early with me every day, no matter what time we got to bed, to make it to events on time so that we didn't miss a minute of the precious time we'd been purchasing tickets for over the past year. She napped with me on the train. She forgave me for dropping her cowbell into oblivion when we still had events left. I love my sister. 


Favorite American fans: Ben and Heather. They were on their HONEYMOON. Who needs Sandals when you can drink beer at "halftime" for Super Combined with other Big Ten grads, do snuff, have a "photo shoot" at Austria House, and get free tickets for Ski Jump that night? We'll see you crazy kids in Korea!  

Favorite Olympic Athlete: Mikaela Shiffrin. USA had a hard Olympics from a medal perspective, so her teenage optimism was refreshing and she never gave up hope! 


Favorite kids: Russian kids, duh. They're awesome. They never whine, they behave like little angels (even in MUSEUMS), and they adorably don't smile in photos. Individual award: The Australian kid who "went for the Colts", had the biggest toothy grin, and agreed that he was the luckiest kid in the world. The worst was the kid from NYC who had been on the Today show, came with his dad and was going to all kinds of events, and when I suggested HE was the luckiest kid in the world, he said "Why?". Wrong answer, bucko. Gulag for you.


Favorite conversation overheard: Russians telling a Czech that Obama had pushed propaganda into the American media about not coming to the Olympic games, and that's why there weren't many Americans there. It sounded a lot like the stuff you hear our media saying about Putin, so it was pretty funny. 

Favorite mascot: I have to agree with Putin, the snow leopard was the coolest.

Some fun quotes: 

"It's the Notre Dame of the world"--Lara, on no one cheering for China

"You're a lesbian"--Russian guy's answer when we asked him if he knew what the rainbow ribbon around my cowboy hat meant. We tried to tell him it meant I was a supporter, but he was really non-chalant about it anyway. None of the 30+ Russians we took photos with that night had a problem with it. 

"No more 8's??"--Heather, on the lack of her favorite beer. 8 was wheat beer, 7 was lager, 0 was ALCOHOL FREE. They always had plenty of those, but ran out of lots of things pretty regularly. Especially during "halftime" of super combined.

"So washing hands after the bathroom is an American thing?" ---Lara, on the Russian propensity to NEVER wash their hands in the ladies room. It was weird. They seemed to be doing it in Moscow, so maybe it's only at sporting events?

"Russia is like kryponite for Americans"--Jessica after every American fell at half-pipe

"What's with the slow motion of him eating an apple? Is it for the ladies?"--Lara. For some reason, on Valentine's Day, they were showing slow motion videos of the skiers eating apples and bananas on the big screen. It was ODD. And awkward. 


I'm going to miss our Russian brothers, they were the best hosts to us. I'll never forget our time in Sochi, and the bar is set very high for Korea! Can't wait to bring you all there with us! 

Jessica

Friday, February 21, 2014

Lara's Reasons Why Not

We love that so many of you have enjoyed our Olympic blog and followed our Sochi adventure!  We're even more thrilled that so many of you have expressed interest in going yourselves-it is most definitely the trip and experience of a lifetime!  We're planning a blog post that goes over what it costs to go to the Olympics, so hopefully that will push even the more tentative folks over the edge into YES territory!  And if you are a little hesitant, here are some reasons to go (or not go) to the Olympics if you're waffling...

DO go if you straight up love the Olympics-every event, no matter the medal chances of your home country.
DON'T go if you only want to see very few and very specific events.  You're limiting your schedule, your ticket options and prices, and where you'll get to go at the Olympics.  If you only want to see events in the mountains at the Winter Olympics, you don't get into Olympic Park for free, and it's definitely worth seeing.

DO go if you love to travel and experience other cultures.  Planning your trip and actually being at the Games is a mind-blowing cultural mixup of epic proportions.  Interacting with others outside of your own cultural comfort zone results in funny misunderstandings, strange friendships, and a camaraderie that doesn't exist when the Olympics aren't happening.  When I go to visit Jessica in London later this year, I highly doubt anyone will talk to me about the Olympics, even if I wear my red, white, and blue America flair on the Tube (which is a very very sad thought).  The very fact of the Games in a location creates a very special atmosphere of friendliness and fun.
DON'T go if you get frustrated at the idea of non-English speaking volunteers, or non-English signage.  Non-verbal communication works, but it takes some patience.

DO go if you want to see every event possible during your time there, even something that comes up unexpectedly.  There are always tickets available to something, sometimes people are even giving them away for free!  Always be up for a new adventure.
DON'T go if you want to do a lot of sightseeing and tourism based activities.  The Olympics bring a LOT of people to town, and guess what?  They all want to see the Tower of London.  Or the Christ the Redeemer statue.  Or any other myriad of destination highlights.  Unless you plan extra days at the beginning or end of your trip, or a few days in the middle specifically for these things, the time and effort spent getting from one event to the next is time consuming and doesn't allow for a lot of last minute stops.  Erin and I were going to see all manner of London's best tourist destinations-the Tower, the British Museum, the National Gallery, the British Library, etc.  We saw Churchill's bunker and went on a Thames river boat ride.  Late nights spent carousing with Brazilians, Germans, Aussies, the English, and the Dutch make getting up early really difficult.  You're there for the Olympics. BE there for the Olympics.  If you really want to go to Rio, then go to Rio when it's not packed to the gills with people, hotels are overpriced, and flights are overbooked.

DO go if you are prepared to cheer your ass off, dance like no one is watching, and wave your flag like a nutty patriot at the Boston Tea Party.  Because that's what this is ABOUT. 
DON'T go if you are afraid to look silly or too pro-American.  The greatest thing about the Olympics is that you don't have to cloak your patriotism in guilt (as if you should anyway-what's wrong with loving your homeland?).  And if you think wearing some beads or crazy hats is a little over the line, there are dudes in unitards.  There is no way you ever look like the most ridiculous person in the venue.


DO go if you are always someone that says "YES!"
DON'T go if you are someone that isn't up for something exciting, new, and unknown.  Snuff?  Why not?  Ride on the Olympic Park shuttle?  Why not?  Take pictures with random strangers? Why not?  If you can think of reasons why not, then you are missing out on the opportunity to have so much fun your abs are sore from laughing for days afterward.  No one likes a party pooper.

DO go if you are prepared to do a lot of work to get to the Games.  This isn't like a normal vacation.  It's not just about finding a hotel room, it's about finding a place in a location that is close to transportation, or in an area/neighborhood that you want to be.  With the amount of time it can take to get a venue, these factors are important, and research and patience are a huge part of it.  Buying tickets also takes a concerted effort, as you have to plan in advance the tickets you want, establish what you want to pay for them, and then actually buy them.  For countries like Russia and Brazil, you also need to understand and prepare properly for the additional visa requirements, which can be complicated and confusing. 
DON'T go if you expect this work to be done for you.  If you can't help with one thing, help with another.  Be an active participant in the trip-it gets everyone excited when everyone is contributing news, updates, and other exciting facets of the Games!

DO go if you are okay with less than ideal conditions.  Mother Nature doesn't always cooperate for events to go off when you have a ticket for it.  Sometimes there is brown drinking water, stray dogs, and strange toilets.  You will survive.  You might get norovirus, but you will survive.
DON'T go if you are easily frustrated at change, or have toilet anxiety in foreign countries.  The best way to figure out if this is you is to find out how you feel about porta-potties.  If you refuse to use a porta-potty, stay home.  Not that every toilet is a porta-pottie, and it's not like people should be amped to use a porta-pottie, but don't subject your fellow travellers to weird constraints or travel speedbumps based on your toilet hang ups.

DO go if you are okay with surviving on hot dogs and donuts. You'll be able to squeeze in a few decent meals here and there as time and schedule allows.  But don't get your hopes up on fancy restaurant reservations-you're going to be exhausted and sometimes a hot dog just seems like a lot less of a hassle.
DON'T go if you are a picky eater that can't be satisfied with mere concession stand food.  Look, I get it-I'm a total foodie, but the Olympics are not the time to demand Michelin star restaurant service.  You're going to be eating a LOT of concession stand food-some of it okay, some of it terrible, some of it that words can't possibly describe.  What feeds you during the Olympics is the experience.  And the beer. 

If you want to go, feel free to ask us questions!  We'll answer whatever we can!

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Goodbye To The Sochi

Aw, Sochi, we hardly knew ya, now it's time to leave ya.  I know that we keep saying that it's hard to put into words how much fun the Olympics are, and part of it is because you are so focused on the fun and atmosphere that you forget about all of the little, hilariously random moments.  Like seeing guys in French unitards checking their text messages at the train station.  Or thinking you have a private joke on how the train announcer says "Esto Sodok" until you see Russians giggling about the same thing.  Or fighting with a cab driver who took you to Adler AIRport, not the Adler Port, and agreeing on an increased price that includes kisses.  (Yes, I'm aware that I talk too fast).  Or the way when Russian men "make" photos with you they want to be in the MIDDLE of the women, like you are theirs.  Or how amazing it feels to order food at a place where you get it quickly (thanks, Adler train station!).

So here we are at the end, and I'd love to share my favorites:

Favorite Event:  Ski Jumping.  Although Snowboard Cross was thrilling and exciting, the party atmosphere and the cheers of the crowd when a particular jump was achieved was awesome.  Plus, we met some amazing American siblings there!

Favorite Venue:  Biathlon.  Both days, ha ha.  The first day when it got cancelled, we made a party in the fog and had a great time even without an actual event.  And we met a super cool guy, Vincent, who partied with us all night, and a German man that gave us sweeties.  Which is now my favorite word for candy.  Then when we finally got to see the event, we were in General Admission, again a giant party, with a really intimate concession and bathroom area.  Plus-SNOWSTORM!

Favorite USA vs. Russia Moment:  Yeah, I made up an arbitrary event in order to shoehorn in our kickass hockey game experience.  8 shootouts!  The Russians were so into the game, a tiny tiny tiny tiny part of me almost wanted them to win just to see their reaction.  Honorable mention:  A chess set at a souvenir fair that had old Soviet flags and US flags on the chess pieces.

Favorite Event Where We Got To See An American Medal:  Well, there was only 1-Snowboard Cross.  But it was GREAT!

Favorite Country House:  We only went to one, but it was killer.  Austria House, we will never forget your delicious schnitzel and the roast beef and potatoes.  And the Stigel.  Definitely the Stigel.

Favorite Foreign Fans:  The Russians.  Sure, there were great costumes and friendly folks from all over (except for you, CANADA), but the Russians were great hosts, and were such an amazing home crowd for their athletes.  Plus, they kept saying "Russia and America, FRIENDS FOREVER!"  I hope we entertained them.  Honorable Mention:  Australians.  Funny and friendly.  And not too good to rub elbows with loud Americans (ahem, Canada)

Favorite Cab Ride:  The one with the drunk guys.  Mainly because it was slightly terrifying and therefore thrilling.

Favorite Stray Dog:  The 3 legged one.  Everyone loves an underdog.

Favorite Toilet:  The undiscovered treasure of the handicapped toilets with super clean facilities and no line.  Definitely not the one I hung out with for an entire night thanks to norovirus.

Favorite Christenson Sister:  Jessica.  Yes, we got in a fight.  Yes, we bickered.  But I dare you to find a sister that loves the Olympics and has as much fun with foreigners as my sister does. 

Favorite Trivia Question:  Stella the Fella.  Look it up.  You can finish reading this when you've stopped laughing.

Favorite Olympian Name:  Freek Van Der Woort.

Favorite Handsome Olympic Athlete:  Hot Norwegian curling guy.  Otherwise known as Mr. Handsome.

Favorite Concession Food:  Well, besides beer.  Chocolate Donuts!  The food was that terrible at the venues.

Favorite Security Pat Down:  I feel like Adler Train Station gave the best breast massages.


I'm sad to leave.  My flag is sad, too.  Our flight is at 5:30am, so that means no last super fun night, because I'm not in my 20's and know what that would feel like on the flight.  We'll have our final awards to post and lots more random thoughts once we have a chance to put a few hours of sleep together in a row stateside.  This is important, because I'm already dropping my articles and other unnecessary words like our new Russian friends. Until then, Dos Verdanya!!

Monday, February 17, 2014

"Disappointed Sisters"

 Hey, did you guys see this????  We're famous.  Don't worry, we promise not to change.  We were already jerks before the fame arrived.

Bloomberg News Blurb

So, yes, disppointed sisters and disappointed friends we were indeed to have the 2nd of 2 events in a row cancel due to the fog.  We had no events for tomorrow, so luckily, the rescheduled times work with what we had going on!!  Thank goodness we didn't get more greedy when it came to tickets, otherwise I would be missing out on 2 of my favorite events to watch-biathlon and snowboard cross!  Snowboard cross, for those that don't know, is an actual RACE.  No timed runs of one person down the hill, just you against the other people beside you.  The USA has good medal chances here.  WATCH IT.  It's great, you'll love it!

Biggest Olympic tip and life tip EVER:  Always have an emergency meetup point.  Always.  At every venue, at every public transit stop, always, always, always have a meetup point.  We have found that even though the Olympic crowds are smaller, they are also like the Mississippi River when it comes to exiting.  Even in the General Admission section, it can be impossible to find your friends if you meet there!   The funny thing we found is that we all DO think alike in "What would person X do?" but that doesn't help when there are thousands of people trying to leave a venue.

After Jess and I lost Erin and Mike, we ended up finally having a proper Russian (well, Georgian) meal at a place in Esto Sodok, which is in the mountain cluster.  We sat across from a nice couple that got the waitress to bring English menus for us, and the food was really great.  After days of horrid hot dogs (seriously, Russia, how do the lips, cheeks, and rear ends of animals taste so terribly different in the USA?), it was a much deserved break.  We had some pork with onions and a really great cheese on top, then mushrooms with the really great cheese on top, and some dumplings that had a beef and pork filling.  Sooooo good.  Also, I never want to drink anything but sour cherry juice for the rest of my life.  Greatest thing ever.

On our bucket list, we wanted to find a Russian woman we mistook for a man.  Well, we haven't seen one so far, but ALL Russians definitely have the biggest balls when it comes to getting to the front of a line.  If you ever wondered why they produce such amazing athletes, this is why-they ALL want to be first.


Jessica and I went to curling yesterday morning and it was so fun to watch live!  The curling rink was FREEZING in comparison to hockey and speed skating...maybe it was because we were closer to the ice, or there were less people, but it was a good help to keep our sleep deprivation from kicking in.  Plus, the hottie in the crazy pants on the Norwegian team piqued our interest and held our most rapt attention throughout the games.  The USA lost to Canada, and Russia lost to Sweden, but it was still fun and the curling rink was really intimate and close to the action!   It was awesome live!  I remember when they brought curling back in 1998-I was in college, and we were glued to the TV everywhere we went-parties, bars, etc, because we had never seen anything like it before.  Massively great to see one of my favorite Winter Olympic live.

The Paralympics are going to start after the Olympics and we are all still mystified by how exactly they think the mountain venues are handicapped friendly.  There are a minimum of 5000 stairs for every event, and no where that I can see where people in a wheelchair could reasonably get there.  It's nuts.  Are they planning on using a claw like in Toy Story to pick them up and deposit them at their seat?  I mean, I kind of hope so because that would be AMAZING.

I feel like I won't need my yearly trip to the lady doctor after the amount and the in depth nature of the patdowns I've received.  The security ladies in Russia could tell me if I have breast cancer.  Not gonna lie, the full body massage before every train ride is kind of relaxing.


Dear Canada-every Canadian I know in person is a very, very, very nice person.  Why do you only send the jerks to the Olympics?

TOILET UPDATE
There is a pretty gross porta potty style toilet near Snowboard Cross, but the rest of the toilets at Snowboard Cross are fine.  And porta potties are gross no matter where you go.  Also, we thought we had such a great scam going by using the handicapped toilets where there's no line (because no handicapped person can get to these events) and today there was someone guarding them!  I know we shouldn't be sad because they're reserved for the handicapped, but STILL.



Funny exchanges:

Me:  "Our media is a bunch of whiny little bitches."
British guy:  "Your words, not mine."

Erin:  I took a picture of that girl that got hurt on the mountain from our gondola to biathlon. 
British guy:  You are a horrible person.

Talking about how the children don't smile in pictures
Australian guy:  I got one to smile, and their parents waved their finger at him.  Like "YOU WILL NOT SMILE AND YOU WILL BE HAPPY ABOUT IT."

At a booth at a souvenir fair after buying the Sochi stacky dolls
Russian:  Why you buy this?  It's terrible

German man:  You want sweeties?
Jessica and Lara:  WE WANT SWEETIES!!!

Lara:  Apparently washing your hands is an American thing???









Sunday, February 16, 2014

How to survive cancellations of Olympic proportions

If ever you take a 1 hour trip to the top of a mountain in Russia, and the biathlon competition gets cancelled, follow these rules: 

1) Make friends with an awesome French dude. Sing the French national anthem with him (P.S. Learn some foreign anthems. It's good for you.)

2) Buy your booze before the concession stand closes, pretty much as soon as you hear the event is cancelled. 

3) Do not, I repeat, do NOT get into the ridiculous line to go back down the mountain. This is insanity at its best.

4) Find the stage. That one playing a mix of American hits and Russian electronika. If there is no one dancing, pull out your American flag and start dancing. The Russians will arrive in droves to "make a photo" and dance with you. Try to get them to limbo under your flag. Fail. 

5) find the snowmobiles. Just in case you need another way down the mountain. Think like James Bond. In the meantime, take 20 photos of yourself with the snowmobiles. And the security guys guarding them. Bonus points if they LOOK like Bond villains.

6) Video the 90% Russian crowd with you. They're unintentionally funny. 

7) Find the bar next to the gondola down the mountain that the tricksy concessions people hid from you. On the way in, grab some Haribo from that crazy German dude with a stuffed eagle that's Parrot sized. 

8) Accidentally wander into a team area and get your photo with two handsome German Olympian speed skaters, after asking them for directions in German, like they're your tour guides. Get their thoughts on how humiliating it is to wear ugly neon outfits at opening ceremonies when you're a badass.

9) Make Russian volunteer (who is a dead ringer for your Russkie MBA roomie) wait for you while you pee, before he personally guides you down the mountain after it seems to be closed. 

10) Negotiate your cab ride home with a group of "taxi" drivers. Yell "nyet" when you do not get the price you want. Don't be surprised when you go home in an auto with no seatbelts. Be thankful they are not drunk like your taxi driver from the other night. 

11) Drink the welcome home vodka shot. Because this has been one of the best nights of your life. Ever. #sochi2014